From the movie “The Hangover”:

Alan Garner: Hello. How ’bout that ride in? I guess that’s why they call it Sin City.

[awkward laughter]

Alan Garner: You guys might not know this, but I consider myself a bit of a loner. I tend to think of myself as a one-man wolf pack. But when my sister brought Doug home, I knew he was one of my own. And my wolf pack… it grew by one. So there… there were two of us in the wolf pack… I was alone first in the pack, and then Doug joined in later. And six months ago, when Doug introduced me to you guys, I thought, “Wait a second, could it be?” And now I know for sure, I just added two more guys to my wolf pack. Four of us wolves, running around the desert together, in Las Vegas, looking for strippers and cocaine. So tonight, I make a toast!

★ Having trouble keeping up with all of the Republican sex scandals? Well TPM took the time to map it out for us.

TPM

★ This goes out to you, KHS Class of ’97

★ Now you got a crap-load of squares!

★ It sucks to be this guy. This is proof that karma really is a bitch.

A boss and his secretary who were having an affair saw their romantic tryst interrupted in a wince-inducing manner – after a car crash led her to accidentally bite his penis off.

According to reports in China Press and Sin Chew Daily, the 30-year-old woman was performing oral sex on her boss in a car in a Singapore park, when the car was struck by a reversing van.

The impact caused her to bite the man’s penis off.

Full story

★ Not to make light of a serious issue, but XKCD must have been watching the Twitter stream get hit hard by trending #swineflu just like me. Because this is exactly what I saw.

So if Twitter is the “Pulse of the Internets”, then XKCD must be the pulse of Twitter…? I don’t know. But it’s funny because it’s true.

If you want to follow the outbreak globally in realtime, this google maps mashup is the best place.

We’ve been trying to have a baby for six months…

★ This was just too funny to not post. Enjoy.

★ And the hits keep on coming with another CollegeHummor Original

★ ONN does it again. It’s gonna be Legend-wait for it-Dairy.

★ Mr. Chi-City AKA Mr. Goodbar

★ CH does it again.

★ Are we really surprised. This is just the natural progression in the “Rick-Rolling” phenomenon. If you pay attention you can see this trend all over the internets.

★ “Closure” defined.

★ Take what we’ve learned from the economy and apply it to other areas.

★ This is how my friday feels.

★ The perks of the job

★ This is exactly why a Superman & Batman movie will never happen.

★ Envy……. apparently it also has red arrows hovering over its head.